I knew I loved Superman. I knew I was in love with him and wanted to marry him, but I wasn't about to mention any of that to him till I knew God wanted me to marry him.
A few days before this revelation, I was driving back from Utah with Superman's mom, Robin. We talked about a lot of things (this woman really is a second mother to me!) and finally got around to discussing me and her son. She said, "Well, it's no secret that Superman intends to make you his bride." I just looked at her like, "Really? It's not a secret?" Then she realized that it was more of a secret than she had thought.
She wasn't quite sure what to say then, so she told me that Superman had an experience after his sister's wedding and that she wasn't allowed to go into details. I said, "That's the day he said that thing to me in Chinese." (The day he told me he loved me.) Then Robin said, "What he said that day was a direct result of what happened after the wedding."
It was just two days after that conversation that the reality of my love for Superman hit me. Not only did I love him and he love me, but I had a pretty good feeling he wanted to marry me.
On Friday, (two days after I knew I loved him), we were talking on the phone about receiving answers to prayers, among other things. He had shared an experience about an answer he'd received recently, and I had a feeling it had to do with our relationship. At that point, I started to wonder if I should tell him that I loved him, and I wanted to ask if his answered prayer had anything to do with me. But I didn't know if I should say all that or not.
(I was a bit damaged by my relationship with Mr. Beatles. I'm normally an exceptionally confident person. But our failed relationship, and me knowing that I had fooled myself so completely, left me second-guessing myself at every turn. Should I say this? Should I do this? What if it's wrong? It was exhausting!)
So I was second-guessing my gut instincts. I told Superman that there was something I wanted to say, but didn't know if I should. He said, "Why don't you say a prayer about it?"
Hmm. Not a bad idea. So I did just that. I prayed, asking the Lord if I should tell Superman of my love and suspicions about his intentions.
As soon as I uttered the prayer, my heart started pounding. Now, I know that the Spirit speaks to everyone in different ways. It's common to hear of a burning in your bosom. I've never felt that. I know the Spirit is speaking to me when I feel like my heart is going to pound out of my chest. And that's exactly what happened in that moment.
So I told him I loved him. I told him I knew he'd had some kind of experience after Kelli's wedding, and asked him if the answer to prayer he'd told me about was about our relationship.
Then he said that he needed to say a prayer.
A minute later, he answered my question. He said that yes, his recent answer prayer had to do with me. It was the same experience that his mom had told me about. He had prayed about his growing feelings for me, and wanted to know whether or not he should act on them. He only wanted to pursue a relationship if it was going to lead to marriage, and save us both the heartbreak if it wasn't.
He told me that the Lord answered his prayer, and said that I would be his wife -- that he was the man described in my patriarchal blessing.
When he told me that, my heart started pounding out of my chest again, and I knew that was the witness from the Spirit I had been waiting for. It was like I was hearing his testimony, and the Spirit was bearing witness of the truthfulness to me.
I knew we were supposed to be married, and I knew I knew it.
The next morning, I casually asked my mom over breakfast what she thought about a planning a wedding for December.
She nearly fainted.
That night, I went with Superman's parents and sisters to a wedding in their family. When I saw Robin, I gave her a hug and whispered in her that I was going to marry her son.
She nearly fainted, too.
Superman and I started praying about a wedding date. I wanted to get married in December. It was already the end of June. That would give us plenty of time. But he wasn't quite sure that was what we should do. He thought we should get married at the end of August, when he had a 2 week break between semesters.
I wasn't too thrilled about that time schedule. Not only was only 8 weeks away, but I had been planning a wedding TO ANOTHER GUY for August. It just felt so..........wrong to plan a wedding to someone else for the same month!
I should've realized by that point that what *I* thought was logical and what *God* knew to be best weren't always the same.
After a few days of serious prayer and soul-searching, I realized that August was when God wanted us to be married.
In a stroke of luck, my grandma just happened to be going out to Utah for a week to attend her great nephew's wedding. She was leaving on July 5 and was more than happy to have me along for the ride. I arranged to stay with a friend in Provo.
The entire week, Superman kept trying to trick me into thinking he was going to propose. The first night I was there, he asked me to get something from fridge. I opened it up to find a rose and a card that said, "Wonder Woman, will you ma---- (then I had to turn the card over) ---ke cookies with me while you're here?"
And the next day he picked me up from my friends, opened my car door and bent to tie his shoe. He asked me to look in the glove box, where I found a small white box. I looked at him, knowing it wasn't the real thing, and he smiled and told me to open it. It, of course, was empty. I just told him that he hadn't fooled me and he'd half to do much better than that.
On Wednesday, July 9, we headed up to Salt Lake to spend some time on Temple Square. We walked around for a bit, then went to see The Testaments. It was perfect. I'd had a hard time while I'd been there. I knew I loved Superman, and that I wanted to marry him. I knew I was supposed to marry him. But just a month before, I'd been all lovey with another guy. And while Superman and I had completely rebuilt our relationship in the month he'd been home, it was basically a friendship. We'd only kissed on that one day, and only held hands on two different occasions. We parted as friends, and reunited knowing we'd get married. It was just a little awkward for me.
So going to see The Testaments that day was the best thing we could've done. It is impossible not to feel the Spirit when you watch that movie, and I needed that comforting presence to reassure me of correctness of my choice.
After The Testaments, Superman and I walked out to the Joseph and Emma Smith statue on Temple Square. We had talked about them a few nights previous and so it was a special place for us to be. He sat me down on the bench, then knelt and pulled out the ring from his pocket. He said, "I love you. I'll love you forever. I need you. Will you marry me?"
"Yes," I whispered, and kissed him.
And then I took a real look at the ring -- the first time I had seen it. We hadn't talked about a ring at all, so it was a total surprise! While I had a feeling that there was a special reason for us going to Temple Square that day, I didn't know for sure whether or not he was going to propose there, or how he was going to do it. (As compared to Mr. Beatles, where I knew every detail.) I love surprises, so it was perfect.
Anyway......the ring. Just to remind you all, I picked the ring Mr. Beatles and I bought. It was white gold, with a think band that held a round, floating diamond. It was gorgeous, but looked really bad on my pudgy finger. One of the things I was most worried about with the ring from Superman was that it was going to resemble my other ring, which I obviously didn't want.
I shouldn't have been worried. Superman had done his homework. He talked to my mom about it. She told him what my other ring had looked like. She'd also overheard me telling my best friend that I'd love a marquis cut diamond, and relayed that information. She also told him my ring-size.
The ring he picked was (is) gorgeous. It's yellow gold with a marquis diamond and a sapphire on each side of the diamond. After I told him I'd marry him, he explained the ring to me.
"I picked gold for your hair, the sapphires for your eyes, and diamond for your spirit, because it's the most brilliant part of you."
How freakin' sweet is that?!?!? Um, heckYES I will marry you!!!
The band is also really slender, which looks a whole lot better on my pudgy finger.
The next day, a very talented friend took engagement photos for us. (Little story for you: The engagements shots of Mr. Beatles and I were horrible. I'm not a photogenic person. Out of the 50 pictures we took, only ONE was good of me. The engagements with Superman? INCREDIBLE. Nearly every shot was a good one of me! Superman is highly photogenic, so that was never a worry, but I couldn't believe how well these turned out of me. I know it was because I was happy from the inside out, when that hadn't been the case before.)
Grandma and I drove back to Utah 2 days later, where the wedding plans commenced. Back when I was engaged to Mr. Beatles, I had asked my grandma if she'd sew my wedding dress. We bought a pattern and material in mid-May. So that hurdle was out of the way. She just had to sew it.
Superman's sister had just been married in June, so his mom had all kinds of decorations still. I decided just to go with the same color scheme because it would save us so much time and money. We even used the same bridesmaid dresses.
Superman and I decided to get married in Nauvoo, Illinois. The closest temple to us was in Oklahoma City, a three hour drive. That would've been fine, but it's a mini-temple and basically, I wanted a really picturesque temple. Also, Superman and I already had a "connection" to Joseph and Emma, so we thought Nauvoo was appropriate. Superman had never been to Nauvoo, and the temple had only been operating for about a year. I had actually gone to the open house the year before with the singles' ward and thought it would be totally awesome to get married there.
We picked it for a lot of reasons. :o)
The only drawback was that it was an 8-hour drive. But as we looked into things, we found that we could rent a house for a few days that slept like 30 people. (One room had 6 bunk beds!) It was a relatively low cost, so we decided to rent that for the wedding party.
Superman finished the summer semester on August 15, then drove to Kansas. We went to the Oklahoma City Temple on the 19th, where I received my endowment. On the Friday the 22nd we left for Nauvoo, and BARELY made it to the county seat before they closed for the weekend to get our marriage license.
We got married on Monday, August 25, 2003 in a beautiful ceremony. The officiator said some very special things to us, and Superman cried more than I did. It was the most important and beautiful day of my life.
We "honeymooned" in Nauvoo, then drove back to Wichita on Thursday, the 28th. Our reception was the next day, and it was exactly what I wanted. A huge party! We danced and danced and danced. There were a ton of people. We had a BLAST.
We packed up the next day and drove to Utah. We stayed the night in Denver, then drove the rest of the way on Sunday. Monday was labor day and we moved into our apartment, then Superman started classes on Tuesday.
Just to be clear on this whole thing, I'm going to give a brief timeline of events.
June 3 - Superman comes home from his mission
6/7 - Intervention. Unload to Superman. Decide to go to Utah for wedding.
6/8 - Leave for Utah and Kelli's wedding
6/10 - Kelli's wedding, Superman says "I love you" in Chinese. Knows he is to marry me.
6/14 - Return to Kansas. Know that Superman probably loves me. Entertain possibility of "us."
6/15 - Officially break things off with Mr. Beatles
6/17 - Superman tells me he loves me. Kiss. I freak out later that night.
6/19 - Our one date with dinner, movie and dancing.
6/21 - Leave with Superman and his mom to drive him out to BYU.
6/22 - Completely infatuated. Intense feelings of love towards the Superman.
6/23 - Not infatuated. Thoroughly confused. "I love you, too . . . as a best friend."
6/24 - Drive home with Robin. Discover Superman had a special experience and intends to marry me.
6/25 - Possible ovarian cyst. Lots of pain and fear. All I want is to talk to Superman, but can't. Realize I actually do love him.
6/27 - Phone conversation with Superman. The Spirit testifies to me that I am to marry him.
6/28 to 7/1 - pray about the wedding date. Decide on late August.
7/5 - Drive to Utah with grandma.
7/9 - Superman proposes
8/25/03 - Marry in the Nauvoo Temple
(The quote says, "Once in a while, right in the middle of an ordinary life, loves gives us a fairy tale.")
So there you have it, folks!! Superman is the best man I know, and the best friend I've ever had. He truly saved my life, and my eternity. He's the only man I can actually see getting me to exaltation.
Whew. We now return you to your regularly scheduled aMAYzing and perfectly ordinary blog. Thanks for sticking it out with me.